You know what I think? We should all just be decent human beings to one another. No, not just decent, but ridiculously inspiring and amazingly kind human beings. Wouldn't that be awesome?
But let's be real, some people are going to be absolutely rotten to you. You might leave a conversation feeling like you've talked to Cruella DeVil on her way to make furs out of Dalmatians or the Grinch on his way to steal Christmas.
Here's the catch - you don't have to reciprocrate their rotten-ness. I mean, it would be easy to just be rotten right back, treat them the way they treated you. But you my friend, you have a choice, a conscious choice, on how YOU will act.
You can't control Cruella or the Grinch, you have no control over how they treat you, but you do have control over how you treat them. Choose to be at the VERY LEAST decent to them. Choose not to be rotten, because when was the last time that two rotten people made anyone happier? Choose to show them love, because honestly, I'm sure Cruella expects people to be rotten to her, and heck, so does the Grinch, they're used to it. But what they're not used to, is people being kind even when they aren't.
So be a kind, amazing, inspiring human being, regardless of others actions. Don't let rotten people dictate how you are going to live your life, because it's YOUR choice on how you treat people and how you live. And I'll agree, it's REALLY hard to always be happy and kind and amazing, and all those other good adjectives, but at the VERY least, chose to be nothing less than a decent person.
Make the conscious choice to be a good person, because the world could always use more good people.
YSK: Phired Up
31.10.13
My YSK (you should know) series is a pretty simple concept - they are things, organizations, causes, people, movies, opportunities, and much more that I think that you should know about!
Today, I will share with you my love for Phired Up Productions, a company that is amazing for helping achieve organizational growth and social excellence. If you have been following me for a while, I talked about them long, long, ago (so in reality maybe a year) in my post Sorority Recruitment. And even though I am no longer a collegiate member of my sorority, I still truly believe in the work that they do.
While I haven't had the pleasure of meeting every single person with Phired Up, I can tell you this: every person that I have met has been genuine, authentic, and awe inspiring. They travel. They travel a lot. But even amidst all of that traveling and all of those people, they continue to live in the moment, be intentional and engaged, and truly invest in YOU.
The passion they have for the fraternity/sorority community is unrivaled. They KNOW that as Greek organizations, we can change the world. They have a way of igniting a flame in the people they meet, and it is this flame that will set the world on Phire with crazy passionate people - people who are ready to get together, make waves, and make our world a better place. They motivate and inspire people to be the best version of themselves and share themselves, uninhibited, with world - and if that doesn't make for a better world, I don't know what does!
I can confidently say, without a doubt in my mind, that every encounter with someone from their organization has made me a better person. Seriously. Words are not enough to describe how amazingly powerful, innovative, and caring these people are, and for that I will always be grateful.
Want to learn more about being socially excellent and Phired Up? Just check out their website, creep on their twitters, and fall madly in love. Trust me, it's bound to happen.
You should know them, you really should!
Build me up, before you go go
13.9.13
The other day, I was talking to one of my friends who recently went through a break up, and he said to me "it's hard, but it's okay though, I come here and I feel a lot better." Any guesses on where we were? We weren't at a gym or at the park, we weren't at a restaurant or getting dessert, we weren't at an amusement park or a movie either.
We were at work, yeah, that's right, work.
Crazy right? For most people, the idea that someone actually goes to work and their mood is improved, sounds like a myth, but at Vivint, it's something that happens daily. This conversation really got me thinking about how incredibly blessed I am to work at Vivint, a company that is filled with insanely positive, hilarious, caring, and upbeat people. I work in an office where we genuinely care about each other and you might get told that you're "off the proverbial chain." I work at a place where people stay late so they can beat up on each other in ping pong. Vivint's a place where we don't just punch in and out of and leave, it's a community, it's a family. We work together, we invest in each other, and we build each other up - not just to be better at our jobs, but better versions of ourselves.
And it's all of this, and so much more, that makes me love my job and the people I work with. My work environment is simply put, uplifting.
When I think about it, it's a truly amazing and rare culture we have at Vivint, but it shouldn't be (rare, that is). We each have the ability to invest in one another, we have the ability to uplift others with each little interaction we have. So what are you waiting for? Tell someone you appreciate them for what they do, because while it's thought a lot, it's not spoken aloud nearly as much as it should be. Let those around you know that they are valued and awesome and wonderful. You are a part of building the culture and the environment you work and live in, so why not make it a positive one?
Swallow it
10.8.13
Alright, so let's all take a few seconds (or more) to laugh at the title because it's a little bit funny and we're all just a little bit immature. I'm sure that some parts might get a little bit dodgy with the whole swallowing reference, but don't be fooled, this isn't meant to be a funny post, it's about emotions and vulnerability and just the mention of those two words probably made you want to close out of this window, run away, and never look back, but please, just stay a while!
For those of you who know me, you probably haven't seen me cry - not because I don't cry or because I don't have emotions, because trust me I do and I definitely do.
Whenever I feel like crying in any situation, whether it be in happiness, joy, sorrow, or pain, I don't do it. I can feel it coming, but I choose to fight it, I refuse to cry. When I start to feel those tears well up in my eyes and that lump start to form in my throat, I don't let it out, I swallow it. I swallow it and pretend like that weird moment before I was about to cry, didn't just happen.
And I know that I'm not the only one who does it, even though it's not talked about, I am positive I'm not the only one. We get this notion in our heads that tears are a sign of weakness and I think that I am finally realizing that's not true (no, not in the cliche "tears aren't weakness, from the beginning of time it's a sign that you're alive" quote way - but we'll get to that later).
When I think back to the times where I chose to swallow the lump and fight back the tears there is one common thread. It wasn't that I was sad or frustrated or embarrassed or any other emotion on the spectrum. Each and every time I decided to swallow that lump, it was because something deeply affected me at the core; whether that was me relating too closely to someone's story or feeling deep love for a friend/family member or being passionate in my purpose, whatever was being talked about was something that really hit home for me. The tears don't necessarily come from the same emotions, rather, they come from places that are truly important to me and my life. Tears aren't necessarily a sign that you're alive, rather they are an indicator of what you're living for.
I've begun to see crying in a new light; I don't see it so much as weakness anymore, but a sign of a importance and if you let it, an indicator of a powerful moment or conversation just waiting to happen.
Imagine if in that conversation where I was feeling uncomfortable because I, too, felt like I didn't belong in the group at times - what an immensely powerful conversation could and would follow. Imagine what a powerful dialogue would follow if you just had the courage to tell your story and let the other person know that they are not alone. If you didn't swallow that lump, if you didn't fight those tears, how impactful would that conversation be, not just for the other person, but for you as well? If you didn't dismiss that feeling in your stomach or the lump in your throat, where would that conversation lead you? I'm not a big fan of what if's and this isn't about regret, it's about seeing missed opportunities and moving towards change.
Tears are tied deeply to who and what we value, and in letting people see our values, we let them see who we truly are and that can be a scary thing. Being vulnerable can be uncomfortable, it can be terrifying, but it can also be freeing and exhilarating. Vulnerability is often confused with weakness, so saying that vulnerability is the key (to life really) might be a little hard to wrap your head around, but I have learned (and I am still learning) that vulnerability opens doors that secrets and fear keep locked, chained, and deadbolted.
Being vulnerable. It's a hard thing to do, it's something I try to practice daily, but I too, slip up. I still swallow that lump, I still hold back the tears, but eventually, I let them out. Maybe not in front of people, maybe I don't say the things I need to in the moment, but when I finally let go and release them, I can see what truly matters to me. Being more vulnerable is a rewarding, yet difficult practice; it is a change in your life that will be beyond worth it.
That lump. It's our initial reaction to swallow it, but I challenge you to fight that first reaction and dig deeper, push further, and allow it to come out. If you let it out, you'd be surprised at how much is in that weird achy lump in your throat. So much power, so much of you, is in there, if you would just let it out.
You don't have to go spill your soul to every person that you come in contact with, you don't have to go around crying all the time, but I am asking that you just try to have the courage to tell your story when that lump in your throat comes up.
For those of you who know me, you probably haven't seen me cry - not because I don't cry or because I don't have emotions, because trust me I do and I definitely do.
Whenever I feel like crying in any situation, whether it be in happiness, joy, sorrow, or pain, I don't do it. I can feel it coming, but I choose to fight it, I refuse to cry. When I start to feel those tears well up in my eyes and that lump start to form in my throat, I don't let it out, I swallow it. I swallow it and pretend like that weird moment before I was about to cry, didn't just happen.
And I know that I'm not the only one who does it, even though it's not talked about, I am positive I'm not the only one. We get this notion in our heads that tears are a sign of weakness and I think that I am finally realizing that's not true (no, not in the cliche "tears aren't weakness, from the beginning of time it's a sign that you're alive" quote way - but we'll get to that later).
When I think back to the times where I chose to swallow the lump and fight back the tears there is one common thread. It wasn't that I was sad or frustrated or embarrassed or any other emotion on the spectrum. Each and every time I decided to swallow that lump, it was because something deeply affected me at the core; whether that was me relating too closely to someone's story or feeling deep love for a friend/family member or being passionate in my purpose, whatever was being talked about was something that really hit home for me. The tears don't necessarily come from the same emotions, rather, they come from places that are truly important to me and my life. Tears aren't necessarily a sign that you're alive, rather they are an indicator of what you're living for.
I've begun to see crying in a new light; I don't see it so much as weakness anymore, but a sign of a importance and if you let it, an indicator of a powerful moment or conversation just waiting to happen.
Imagine if in that conversation where I was feeling uncomfortable because I, too, felt like I didn't belong in the group at times - what an immensely powerful conversation could and would follow. Imagine what a powerful dialogue would follow if you just had the courage to tell your story and let the other person know that they are not alone. If you didn't swallow that lump, if you didn't fight those tears, how impactful would that conversation be, not just for the other person, but for you as well? If you didn't dismiss that feeling in your stomach or the lump in your throat, where would that conversation lead you? I'm not a big fan of what if's and this isn't about regret, it's about seeing missed opportunities and moving towards change.
Tears are tied deeply to who and what we value, and in letting people see our values, we let them see who we truly are and that can be a scary thing. Being vulnerable can be uncomfortable, it can be terrifying, but it can also be freeing and exhilarating. Vulnerability is often confused with weakness, so saying that vulnerability is the key (to life really) might be a little hard to wrap your head around, but I have learned (and I am still learning) that vulnerability opens doors that secrets and fear keep locked, chained, and deadbolted.
Being vulnerable. It's a hard thing to do, it's something I try to practice daily, but I too, slip up. I still swallow that lump, I still hold back the tears, but eventually, I let them out. Maybe not in front of people, maybe I don't say the things I need to in the moment, but when I finally let go and release them, I can see what truly matters to me. Being more vulnerable is a rewarding, yet difficult practice; it is a change in your life that will be beyond worth it.
That lump. It's our initial reaction to swallow it, but I challenge you to fight that first reaction and dig deeper, push further, and allow it to come out. If you let it out, you'd be surprised at how much is in that weird achy lump in your throat. So much power, so much of you, is in there, if you would just let it out.
You don't have to go spill your soul to every person that you come in contact with, you don't have to go around crying all the time, but I am asking that you just try to have the courage to tell your story when that lump in your throat comes up.
Life unscripted
30.7.13
I've been cautious my entire life. I've been a planner. I've known what I wanted and had a plan on how to get it. Always. I didn't want to ever get distracted - if it wasn't in the plan, I'd pass on it.
Did I get what I wanted? Yes. But at the same time, by sticking to this path I created in my head, maybe I missed out on a lot of things too. Not that I regret my decisions at all, because I don't, they led me to who I am now.
After meeting people, loving more openly, and being more vulnerable, I started to change, and for the better. I started to see that I had been cautions all my life, and it was about time I started living. It was time that I started taking that leap and not fearing the fall.
Life is golden. It's joy and pain, both of which can teach me so much more about myself, others, and the world.I find just as much, if not more, happiness from the unplanned spontaneous random encounters in my life as completing my plans and accomplishing my goals. Goals are important and with goals you know the desired outcome, but sometimes, things just take you surprise and change your life for the better. Unplanned and raw emotions make you feel alive in ways that no plan ever could, and that's a part of life that I used to neglect, but now it's a part of life that I won't ever forget again.
Life unscripted isn't half bad. Own every second of your life and live it to the fullest. Embrace the good, the bad, the planned, and the unscripted. We've got this one life, so let's live it and make it beautiful .
Did I get what I wanted? Yes. But at the same time, by sticking to this path I created in my head, maybe I missed out on a lot of things too. Not that I regret my decisions at all, because I don't, they led me to who I am now.
After meeting people, loving more openly, and being more vulnerable, I started to change, and for the better. I started to see that I had been cautions all my life, and it was about time I started living. It was time that I started taking that leap and not fearing the fall.
Life is golden. It's joy and pain, both of which can teach me so much more about myself, others, and the world.I find just as much, if not more, happiness from the unplanned spontaneous random encounters in my life as completing my plans and accomplishing my goals. Goals are important and with goals you know the desired outcome, but sometimes, things just take you surprise and change your life for the better. Unplanned and raw emotions make you feel alive in ways that no plan ever could, and that's a part of life that I used to neglect, but now it's a part of life that I won't ever forget again.
Life unscripted isn't half bad. Own every second of your life and live it to the fullest. Embrace the good, the bad, the planned, and the unscripted. We've got this one life, so let's live it and make it beautiful .
All you need is one
20.7.13
Never underestimate the power of one - because a lot of the time, all you need is one. I thought I blogged about this before, but apparently I didn't (AWKWARD), so here it goes.
A lot of the time, we think we're small (and when you think about it in the sense of the universe, we kind of are). While we may be small, we have so much potential, both for ourselves and for others. There is a lot of power in each and every one of us. I have been lucky enough to have so many people who believed in me, pushed me to be a better version of myself, and were there to help me along the way when I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Sometimes you just need one person to think you are the bees knees; just one person to ignite the flame within. Sometimes, you just need one person to push you, change the game, flip the script, whatever you want to call it. One person, at the right time, in the right place, can help you realize your potential and inspire you to move forward, follow your dreams, grow, and become better than you were before.
While all you may need is one, that's just for a time; over the years you'll start to realize that you've been lucky enough to encounter multiple people who were game-changers for you. The best thing you can do is let them know how much they mean to you and how much their support has meant (because I think these people are often overlooked)
We need to realize that WE can be people of impact; that our actions and words can be the thing that helps motivate someone to believe in themselves or move towards change. With every conversation, every smile, every action, we all have the ability to be game-changers.
A lot of the time, we think we're small (and when you think about it in the sense of the universe, we kind of are). While we may be small, we have so much potential, both for ourselves and for others. There is a lot of power in each and every one of us. I have been lucky enough to have so many people who believed in me, pushed me to be a better version of myself, and were there to help me along the way when I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Sometimes you just need one person to think you are the bees knees; just one person to ignite the flame within. Sometimes, you just need one person to push you, change the game, flip the script, whatever you want to call it. One person, at the right time, in the right place, can help you realize your potential and inspire you to move forward, follow your dreams, grow, and become better than you were before.
While all you may need is one, that's just for a time; over the years you'll start to realize that you've been lucky enough to encounter multiple people who were game-changers for you. The best thing you can do is let them know how much they mean to you and how much their support has meant (because I think these people are often overlooked)
We need to realize that WE can be people of impact; that our actions and words can be the thing that helps motivate someone to believe in themselves or move towards change. With every conversation, every smile, every action, we all have the ability to be game-changers.
The ideal doesn't exisit
3.7.13
To be honest, I've struggled (like many others) for a majority of my life with trying to be perfect, striving to be what I am "supposed to be" as told by my family, teachers, friends, community, media etc. It's horrible, and I won't claim to be cured of wanting to be perfect, but I'm realizing that this ideal that I (and so many others) strive towards, doesn't really exist.
There is NO way to please everyone around. My parents don't want the same things from me that my friends do, my friends don't want the same things as my professors, my professors don't want the same things the media expects of me, and most importantly, a lot of the time, I don't want what ANY of them want from me. So in a world where we we want to fit in and be accepted, how can we if there is so much noise surrounding who we are and the supposed ideal we're told to be?
It's taken me time to realize that the ideal isn't very realistic at all and it might not even exist. What matters most is my happiness, what matters most is pursuing my passions and doing something that I care about deeply. I can focus my energy and try to be a billion things that I'm not, or I can realize what I am and how to make that work for me.
I can spend all of my time trying to be thin, get 4.0's, get a high paying job, be the life of the party, read books, be good at math, have an attractive boyfriend, be trendy, etc. but what matters in the end is if I am happy. Selfish? Maybe, but I think that's what this time in my life is for.
I figure what does all of this matter if I'm not happy with who I am? It's SO, SO, hard to try to let go of what people think of you (after all, we all want to feel acceptance and to feel wanted) and I am no expert. I still care, but I'm trying to put myself first. I want to be happy, and there's no way that I can be if I'm too busy caring about how people think I should be. I can never be happy if I am constantly striving for something that is unattainable.
It's hard to grasp that because of my decisions, people may not like me, and it's even harder to accept people not liking me, but it's the only way I can make true progress in my life. I am proud of who I am and even more proud of the growth I have made to get here.
I'm finding that the more I let go of the idea of "perfection" the more happy I am with life and the better person I am become.
There is NO way to please everyone around. My parents don't want the same things from me that my friends do, my friends don't want the same things as my professors, my professors don't want the same things the media expects of me, and most importantly, a lot of the time, I don't want what ANY of them want from me. So in a world where we we want to fit in and be accepted, how can we if there is so much noise surrounding who we are and the supposed ideal we're told to be?
It's taken me time to realize that the ideal isn't very realistic at all and it might not even exist. What matters most is my happiness, what matters most is pursuing my passions and doing something that I care about deeply. I can focus my energy and try to be a billion things that I'm not, or I can realize what I am and how to make that work for me.
I can spend all of my time trying to be thin, get 4.0's, get a high paying job, be the life of the party, read books, be good at math, have an attractive boyfriend, be trendy, etc. but what matters in the end is if I am happy. Selfish? Maybe, but I think that's what this time in my life is for.
I figure what does all of this matter if I'm not happy with who I am? It's SO, SO, hard to try to let go of what people think of you (after all, we all want to feel acceptance and to feel wanted) and I am no expert. I still care, but I'm trying to put myself first. I want to be happy, and there's no way that I can be if I'm too busy caring about how people think I should be. I can never be happy if I am constantly striving for something that is unattainable.
It's hard to grasp that because of my decisions, people may not like me, and it's even harder to accept people not liking me, but it's the only way I can make true progress in my life. I am proud of who I am and even more proud of the growth I have made to get here.
I'm finding that the more I let go of the idea of "perfection" the more happy I am with life and the better person I am become.
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